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‘Everybody who laughed at that, you need Jesus’: Dwayne Johnson channels Voldemort and Sloth from ‘The Goonies’ in absolute nightmare fuel

Good luck sleeping after this.

HOUSTON, TEXAS - FEBRUARY 18: XFL co-owner Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson make an appearance at TDECU Stadium as the Houston Roughnecks play the Orlando Guardia on February 18, 2023 in Houston, Texas.
Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images

A while back, Dwayne Johnson was given a makeover by his daughters that immediately positioned him as an unlikely candidate to be cast as Voldemort in the first season of Max’s Harry Potter reboot that nobody seems interested in, but it turns out that was just the beginning.

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Seeing a secondary face plastered onto the back of The Rock’s head was bad enough, but a video edit the actor and producer shared on his Instagram is full-blown nightmare fuel. If you’d ever wondered what would happen if you took the highest-paid star in Hollywood, crossed him over with the most fearsome wizard in all of history, sprinkled over Sloth from The Goonies, and then drenched it in self-deprecation, we have questions first and foremost.

Beyond that, the video in question might be exactly what you’re looking for, even if there will undoubtedly be people out there unable to sleep after witnessing Johnson’s additional face barking instructions and giving out hugs like it’s nobody’s business.

Like the man himself says; if you laughed at that, then you need Jesus in your lives. Quite why anybody went out of their way to create the most unsettling cross-pollination of celebrity icon and legendary family film there’s ever likely to be is anybody’s guess, but The Rock is obviously a huge fan of the Frankenstein’s monster that’s been created as a result.

The best idea is not to watch it before bed, otherwise you’re going to be haunted forevermore by the specter of The Rock/Voldemort/Sloth/whatever the hell that is lurking under your bed.