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A cinematic abomination that 89% of viewers detested slides into Max’s Top 3 after dominating Netflix

Just as the prophecies foretold...

Image via Sony Pictures Releasing

Why are streaming subscribers so dead set on using our screen time to enable the most cynically uncreative genre fiction catastrophe of this year? That’s right, folks; Madame Web is back on the streaming charts with a vengeance. Netflix viewers already prioritized it over genuine classics and cheer-worthy success stories, but now that it’s dropped out of the Netflix Top 10, it’s Max‘s turn to keep sounding this abhorrent gong.

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Over on Max, Madame Web is terrorizing the number three worldwide spot for film viewership. Occupying spots number one and two, respectively, are Dune: Part Two, and Am I OK?, which, ironically, happens to be a fantastic Dakota Johnson movie (and an example of what the actress is capable of when she’s not working with bottom-of-the-barrel scripts).

This Max success marks part five of the Madame Web streaming saga, having kicked off with its eclipsing of Shrek and Anyone But You before butting heads with Atlas, and finally getting dismissed from Netflix’s Top 10 with the arrival of Fifty Shades of Grey (which, presumably, hails from the same rock that Madame Web crawled out from under). The Netflix arc may have ended, but now that it’s feeding on the brains of the Max faithful, one shudders to imagine just how many victims Madame Web will claim before it well and truly fades into obscurity.

If you happen to be a good Max Samaritan looking to dislodge Madame Web from its position, we recommend queueing up The Menu, the Anya Taylor-Joy-led horror comedy that’s slowly creeping up the Max rankings, and our greatest hope of combating this threat with a genuinely excellent movie.