3. Howard the Duck (1986)
George Lucas’ Role: Producer
Howard the Duck. Actually say it out loud. Howard the freakin’ Duck. How was this ever a possible business venture? Once again, though, George Lucas separates himself from taking full responsibility by taking a producer’s role, but this disaster has his name written all over it, especially given that we know he told poor Willard Huyck (who directed this steaming pile of uncomedy) about the comic book in the first place.
If you’re unfamiliar with Howard the Duck, it’s the story of an alien duck creature who comes to Earth to chew on cigars and annoy the hell out of everyone he meets. Based on a much better comic book, the movie subverts goodness in every way possible and goes for the lowest common denominator (and even they didn’t like it). It’s a completely ill-judged work of utter trite in every way, basically.
Howard himself is a truly scary creation. Presumably he’s played by a small person in a duck suit, but the effect is more unnerving than it ever is appealing. Even as a rollicking comedy, Howard the Duck can’t be taken with a straight-face. One scene progresses as Lea Thompson pretends to come onto Howard all sexy, which probably makes it one of the strangest scenes ever put into film ever. “Howard, you really are the worst,” goes one line in the film. Spot on.
And just to prove how wrong Lucas and his crew got this adaptation, the creator of the comic said that it was an existential work and that there was no joke to the whole thing. Producer Gloria Katz, faced with all the negative reviews and shitty box office receipts, later commented: “It’s a film about a duck from outer space… It’s not supposed to be an existential experience.” Oops.