Quick Remy Disclaimer: All the movies I chose I adore as horror films, and this article is by no means a reflection of me thinking these films are not awesome – because they are. I just know myself pretty well, and I would have handled some of these situations differently is all.
Quick Nato Disclaimer: I echo Remy’s sentiments for the most part. Some films I definitely adore more than others though – you’ll know once you see my picks.
When watching a horror movie, the hardest thing to do is leave the “horror logic” unquestioned. We all like to believe we know better than the characters on screen, and we all like to convince ourselves we’d make it out alive if stuck in the same scenario, but thankfully the reality of the matter is we’ll never know. Have you heard of anyone ever having to fight a demon in their dreams or escape from the clutches of a killer doll?
The element people forget about though is fear. Sure, hindsight is a powerful thing, and that’s what movie watchers get the benefit of when not acting out the scenarios, but watchers are also sitting in the comfort of their safe, warm, inviting home. People all the time talk about living during a zombie invasion and how easy it would be, but do you think you could really be a master zombie slayer when throwing fear into the mix? Try thinking quick on your feet when mixing in fear, panic, anxiety, terror, chaos, and every other negative emotion that comes along with the apocalypse.
But forget all that noise, because Remy and I are two arrogant horror bastards who (think) we know better than the characters on screen. Time and time again we have to watch characters make the same dumb decisions just to advance the plot, and we’re sick and tired of it. Don’t get me wrong, half the movies that fall into that cliched category still rule, because some decisions absolutely have to be made in order to create tension, but that doesn’t mean a few horror movies could have lasted all of thirty minutes given proper “horror logic.”
Alright, time for Remy and I to blow your minds with some script altering moments of reason that would have saved us some time, avoided destruction, nullified some horror, and maybe even saved some lives.