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‘An upper-class twit’: Donald Trump is no longer the only political clown on Stephen King’s shortlist

Go and boil your bottom, RFK Jr.

Stephen King
Photo by Rick Kern/WireImage

Just when we thought the political arena couldn’t turn into any more of a circus, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. comes sauntering in to prove us wrong.

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The presidential candidate has been in the running for nearly as long as Donald Trump, but without the relevance boasted by either of the main party candidates, his campaign has largely floundered in the background. He’s managed to claim brief relevance in between earth-shattering Trump revelations, but never for anything good. First it was for the parasite eating his brain — that explains a lot — and the latest RFK Jr. head-scratcher is related to the dead baby bear he ditched in Central Park a decade back.

As a result of all the weird and wild news surrounding RFK Jr., his campaign is getting a boost. Not in popularity, by any means, but the 70-year-old’s antics have earned him some name recognition among the nation’s political watchers. Chief among them is Stephen King, who’s had his sights set solidly on Trump for months — but it seems he’s gained a new target.

King took a break from articulately dressing-down the 45th President to instead fire shots at Kennedy, providing those not in the know with a wonderfully concise breakdown of the bear incident. “RFL [sic] Jr. was late for dinner after falcon hunting, so he left a dead bear cub in Central Park,” the celebrated author wrote. “This is a perfect example of what Monty Python’s Flying Circus called ‘an upper-class twit.'”

Since these absolute yahoos are slowly making Monty Python our lived reality, its only fitting to use the comedic troupe’s stylings to explain the wild political situation we now find ourselves in. In fact, we should be leaning on the legendary funnymen far more frequently in our breakdowns of these “boring, tedious, monotonous, cloth-eared, flatulent, swivel-eyed, fornicating little gits.”

King is leading the charge on this new way of scolding our more dull-witted political figures, and it may just be the only way to make it through the next few months with any sanity left. There’s sure to be plenty more shenanigans from both RFK Jr. and Trump before the election comes to a close, so take solace in knowing that, at the very least, these tiny-brained wipers of other people’s bottoms can give us a laugh on their way out.