King Charles III celebrates his coronation tomorrow in a long-awaited ceremony where he shall be symbolically crowned ruler of the British.
Preparations have been well under way. Performers have finally been secured. Guests outside of England are arriving. The world will be watching. Also, the lawn where the coronation will occur has been freshly mowed. Oh, indeed it has.
In fact, pranksters mowed a special design right in the middle lawn. Is it a bird? No. Is it a plane? Nope. Is it Superman? It’s technically possible. What is it? Well, it’s a king-sized penis taking up the center portion of the lawn. Yes, you read that right.
What kind of pr*ck would do such a thing? Some di**head really went out their way here. Surely, the offender will be sacked.
I give them credit for having the balls to do it, though it will likely really piss off the King.
It’s a good thing that Meghan Markle isn’t there, because she would certainly be blamed somehow. The design could simply be representing Charles as the head of the Commonwealth.
Will this lawn design be fixed by tomorrow? If not, we likely won’t see it anyway as people will be standing on it. Maybe they’ll even sit on it.
Will Prince Harry think it’s a design depicting his “frost-bitten todger?” Perhaps it’s meant to represent where Harry lost his virginity, which was on a “grassy field outside of a pub.”
Truth is, it could be worse. Someone could have mowed a design of a Tampax tampon on the lawn, referencing King Charles’ conversation with Camilla. If you’re not familiar with it then let’s just say King Charles has some strange aspirations. If I repeat that convo here, I would be nuts!
Although I appreciate the prankster’s effort, perhaps this lawn design would be better served for King Richard.