Well, holy crap!
In case you foolishly failed to watch the most recent episode of The Bachelorette, here’s a rundown of the drama — sprinkled with my personal opinion on what was really happening. Just a warning: I’m not going to hold back my annoyance at some guys whom many have praised, so get ready for a no-BS explainer on the, well, BS.
First of all, Brayden won Charity Lawson’s first rose — despite her own brother’s warnings — and in so doing, immediately rubbed several of his fellow suitors the wrong way; partly because he bragged too much about it, but mostly because the other men are nothing like the brash, adventurously-accessorized Brayden. Speaking with long experience as a heterosexual man, I can tell you he made the others feel extremely insecure. Now, I can already hear some of you yelling at your phones, protesting on behalf of Brayden’s detractors, “No, it’s because Brayden was not there for the right reasons!” But allow me to respond: that’s exactly what the other men wanted Charity to think. They even told her that. Yet sadly, Brayden was the most realistic contestant, as I believe the show will eventually prove. You’ll be happy — or annoyed — to learn that I even found some people on Twitter who agree with me about Brayden.
If you’ll recall a few episodes ago, when Aaron B (no relation, presumably, to Cardi B) decided to advise Charity that Brayden wasn’t there for the right reasons, it put Charity in such a bad mood that the night was effectively ended, eliminating any chance the other men had to have a short, one-on-one convo with the woman of their desire. Most of the men were vocal towards Aaron B about his poorly-timed expression of Brayden-annoyance.
Meanwhile, Brayden — whose biggest problem is his immaturity — offered a refreshingly mature response to Aaron B — who shall henceforth be called Aaron-sans-the-B, or just Aaron — when he told Brayden what he’d said about him to Charity. Brayden maintained his cool; he did not feel threatened, evidently, and said he was not worried, because he felt Charity knew his real intentions, and further pointed out to Aaron that he’d likely talked sh** about him to Charity because he saw him as real competition. An assessment I 100% agree with, despite Aaron’s denial.
Aaron is the type of guy who believes he knows what a woman wants better than the woman does. He’s also the type who needs to trash others to her to bring such people down, instead of simply relying on his own very real connection with her. Problem is, Aaron otherwise carries himself with maturity, so it fools people — likely including Charity herself — into believing that he wouldn’t resort to such tactics.
At any rate, all of the other men decided that Brayden was worthy of conversation. Oftentimes, when a group of people decides to constantly talk negatively about someone else, it results in their feeling empowered within the group as they receive confirmation for their views, whether or not those views are accurate.
Don’t get me wrong; Brayden shot himself in the foot to some degree, but grown-up men would simply see Brayden for what he is — a highly entertaining, if immature 24-year old who’s not a bad person, but rather an overly-outgoing and perhaps-annoying one. Instead, they damningly concluded that Brayden was “toxic.” They even said as much. These men mistook Brayden’s somewhat-childish desire for attention as being, somehow, a slight to them all. Why? Because he’s a threat to them, and Charity clearly liked him… a lot.
Keep in mind, one of things that almost all of these guys had against Brayden was that he said he felt so affected by seeing Charity kiss someone else that he thought about going home. That’s not inherently “toxic;” it’s more rightly called “a 24-year old dealing with his emotions in a very honest way.” Brayden was genuinely surprised that the others took that to mean he didn’t want to be there, though they likely convinced themselves that was the case, so as to tattle to Charity.
Mere days later, Brayden sat listening to these guys talk about how insecure they felt seeing Charity with someone else, kissing someone else, and having a one-on-one date with someone else. Basically, they expressed how much it sucks, a sentiment not-unrelated to Brayden’s, but which he simply expressed poorly — in fact, some suitors said some of the exact same things Brayden had. At that point, even Brayden realized the hypocrisy.
Brayden said as much, informing the guys he didn’t care what they thought, and then specifically reminded Aaron that he did him wrong, which didn’t sit well with his competition at all.
As soon as this conversation got heated, Charity walked in. It was obvious to her that these guys weren’t happy with Brayden, and they answered her questions about it in front of him and everyone else, leading Charity to speak to Brayden alone — but the annoyance the other men felt towards Brayden had also rubbed off on her. Thus, Brayden had little chance to properly defend himself. Charity was convinced, perhaps rightfully, that Brayden needed to leave.
Ironically, Brayden had spent the day laughing at himself during one of the show’s challenges, which was to find Charity something to eat in the woods (a really strange challenge, if you ask me), and just stayed as honest as he’s always been. It’s worth noting that the other guys were so annoyed at Brayden having fun that they couldn’t stop themselves from expressing, on-camera, their dislike for Brayden — again, also ironically, a far more immature reaction than Brayden ever had.
Brayden entered the competition just wanting to see whether Charity would be the one, but he had also kept it real to himself, noting that the competition process is too brief, and that there’s always the realistic possibility that she isn’t the one. Meanwhile, the other guys flatly stated that they were there expressly to get engaged to Charity — most especially Aaron, though he’s seen in a snippet from a forthcoming episode saying that he isn’t sure whether he wants to get engaged. So the reality apparently hits him all of a sudden, at some point. Maybe Aaron shouldn’t have been so adversarial towards Brayden for the very same — and very realistic — reluctance to base a marriage on a reality TV show.
So thus it was that Brayden, despite starting none of the drama, got sent home by Charity. But the major drama was just around the corner.
Despite being booted from the show, Brayden returned on what appeared to be the following night, asking to speak to Charity. He interrupted John’s convo with her, to the surprise of everyone. He then apologized to Charity one-on-one, and then left again. It seemed to me like he’d intended to convince her that he wanted to stay — however, upon receiving her very abrupt responses, he likely realized she wouldn’t welcome his return, changed his approach, and instead chose to apologize, wish her the best, and leave it at that. Wow, another sign of maturity by Brayden.
But as Brayden was walking out, the others weren’t ready (mostly) to let it go. Aaron even stood up and tried to block Brayden’s departure, demanding that he apologize to John, which is ironic considering Aaron had, days earlier, taken time away from John and everyone else when he decided to complain to Charity. Brayden didn’t care for Aaron’s demands and kept walking, warning, “Get out of my face, bro.”
Aaron followed him, telling him, “You’re not a man.” The others followed also, including John, who expressed to Brayden that he had ruined his convo with Charity and added, “That’s not how you treat a man.”
John would, indeed, be sent home that night, but it’s his own fault; rather than focusing on building rapport with Charity, he wasted his time confronting Brayden about his taking away time with her, meanwhile leaving her alone and at loose ends instead of simply returning and continuing their conversation. And sure enough, the continuation of that convo never happened.
While Brayden was literally leaving for good — which is exactly what the others wanted — there they were, following him to the van to express their emotions, including John. Brayden responded to John by saying, “I promise you, man. I did not come in to cause any drama.” He then added, while seeing the others observing the conversation, “l didn’t want to see these jack a**es.”
That’s when everybody escalated into more irate behavior, and Brayden told Aaron he’d “whip his a**.” Aaron then demanded the driver “get out of here,” as the drama escalated. Pretty funny that Aaron, who talked trash behind Brayden’s back for the whole show up to this point, responded to Brayden threatening to kick his butt by requesting the driver to “punch the gas, man.” Here was his chance for the confrontation he wanted, but instead, he demanded the driver leave quickly.
With Brayden gone, the Bachelorette drama will likely lessen, but now things get serious. Fortunately, not all of Charity’s remaining options are questionable, though.
The level-headed men who didn’t involve themselves in the ongoing drama include Michael, Dotun, Joey, and Xavier. I personally believe Dotun might be the one, but we’ll see what lays ahead for Charity and her remaining — sadly Brayden-less — band of suitors.