Take what follows with a massive, world-ending grain of salt, and understand that much of this remains speculation for the sake of spitballing. Alright, where was I…
Look, I won’t even try to sugarcoat this. You deserve the truth. When a studio has to credit seven total writers for one screenplay, odds are things aren’t going super well. This is the exact issue Lionsgate is having with their upcoming Borderlands movie.
Yes, THAT Borderlands. Beloved video game, super-stylized, yada yada yada. Yet of the writers responsible for bringing this new adaption to life, one, in particular, has drawn some serious attention.
Craig Mazin, creator of Chernobyl and co-creator of one of this year’s biggest shows, The Last of Us, was briefly included on a list of Borderlands credits — but has since vanished. In its place, a mysterious and unfamiliar name has emerged: Joe Crombie. Believe it or not, it’s true. You can look it up yourself.
Now, odds are, Joe Crombie is a very real person. A walking, talking human being who’s out there somewhere singing a song or eating a churro like the rest of us. Ya know, doing something fun.
Yet, that hasn’t stopped folks from speculating that Joe Crombie is a pseudonym in place of Mazin’s natural-born name. Why? Maybe because Mazin doesn’t want anything to do with the finished film.
Amidst countless reshoots and shifting credits, one thing is certain — Borderlands is in real trouble. So it’s not much of a stretch to suggest if a guy like Craig Mazin could get out of it, he would. Mazin even sat down with Vanity Fair recently to discuss his alleged involvement, or lack of it, in the film.
“I am not a credited writer on the film, so I cannot claim any kind of authorship of Borderlands, much less ‘co-writing. I did see the report about the pseudonym, which is false. I did not use a pseudonym. If the name in question is indeed a pseudonym, all I can say is it’s not mine.”
Sure, it isn’t… Joe. In all seriousness, I believe the guy. He probably was never involved with Borderlands in the first place and is unlikely to have had his name removed from the ledger. Still, it’s sort of fun to think that Mazin just pulled the name Joe Crombie out of thin air for the sake of protecting his image.
Who knows? Anyone of us might do the same thing. Heck, I’ll be Micky Mouse if that’s what it takes to get involved with the next big blockbuster — and you can quote me on that.
So as far as Joe Crombie is concerned, if you’re out there somewhere, hit me up. Let’s go ahead and prove your existence first and then worry about the Borderlands movie after the fact. Sound good?